Education

Do Sex Workers Fall for Our Clients?

Do sex workers fall for our clients? Of course we do! We don’t make a habit of dating the people we provide services to. And we don’t go looking for partners at work. But sometimes feelings happen. Sometimes a super sexy, incredible fondness develops for each other. We are intimate with each other. Over time, we develop a sort of no-strings-attached kind of attachment to each other. And SOMETIMES we even fall IN LOVE.

My first experience with this was when I met my oldest daughter’s dad at a strip club. We hit it off immediately and spent the next 4.5 years together. However, he became very jealous and angry about my job. It became a constant fight and he even got kicked out of a strip club near the end of our relationship because he was drunk and harassing me while I was on shift. (It was so embarrassing!)

My current boyfriend was also a strip club customer when I was selling massages there. We never plan for it when we fall for someone. It just happens. When there is chemistry, conversation, and an easy connection… it’s hard NOT to fall in love with a sexy, wonderful client!

But is this a bad thing? I don’t think so. I firmly believe we, as humans, can love more than one person at a time. Mating for life is a tradition and many of us even long for it. But is monogamy natural? For that matter, does loving another person diminish the love I have for my chosen partner?

I think monogamy can be natural for some people some of the time. But many of us realize as we get older that monogamy can also feel like a slow crawl towards death. I also think that loving more than one person does not diminish my love for any of them. I have three children I would die for. My love for each of them is different but equally profound. Loving one does not diminish my love for another.

So, why do humans seem bent on believing that love is something to be hoarded and given only to that one perfect someone who allows us to control and own them and their sexuality and everything to do with who they are as a person? We don’t have that right. No one has that right over another.

In my opinion, the best part of living is loving. Therefore I give my love freely and I’m honoured to accept it too. LOVE IS ALL WE NEED! I definitely have a client or two that I’m in love with. They are the ones I can’t wait to see again. The ones I get excited when I see their text messages. They are the ones I fantasize about when I touch myself. They are a beautiful reminder of what can exist between two people who love each other with no strings attached.

Each person has to decide what is right for them depending on their intimacy and sexual needs. My partner and I only see providers together or apart. This is what works for us. We don’t want someone to interfere in our relationship, so we seek out professionals. We love that communication and consent are so important and an integral part of paying for sensual services. And certainly, when we feel a connection with our providers, we develop love for them too! We also go long periods of time without seeing providers when we feel like it.

You have to decide what’s right for you and it can change from one day to the next. One life to live, friends. Live it to the fullest.

LIVE IN LOVE! I know I am.

Love Annie
www.tntannie.ca

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